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I guess I just feel sad as I miss her friendship. My family has told me to leave it alone as there isn’t much more I can do. I understand that she is probably depressed, but when I give her space and don’t reach out, she accuses me of being a bad friend for not being there. It is just hard to accept being that I have always been “her person”. She lives in the next town and I haven’t seen her in 6 months and haven’t talked to her by phone in 3 months. She keeps telling me that she is going through a rough time, but she doesn’t expand on it at all, so I really don’t know what she is dealing with, nor does she choose to share. I reach out to her by phone, text, and invites to get together and she ignores me, blows me off, or takes days to respond with just a short excuse. She has had many changes in her life in the past year (death in the family, death of a friend, health issues), so I have been patient. My bff of over 30 years has shut me out of her life.
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We let people come in and take over our lives because we are Christians? I feel so badĪbout this if I go back taking her calls or if I don’t take her calls at all. Don’t we have any control about who we have for friends? Should I feel so guilty, yet I feel like I just want her to leave me alone yet I don’t want to She goes to a church and I think she has burned out most of the people there, because the only people she talks to is me and her family or so she said (I think) and even they are not taking her calls ( she said, I think) I know this sounds very selfish on my part, but she would take over my life if I let her. I really don’t want to be friendly with her anymore yet how do you tell someone that you don’t want to be friends with them when she has so much to contend with.
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![cause we cause we](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/7f/5b/11/7f5b11b27139d4c8a8f5215ef1967712.jpg)
I care about this situation but I feel like I am being controlled and I hate it. She is very pushy about this and I have had to stop taking her calls again but I still pray each day for the I really think expecting someone to pray each day with you is a little too much to ask especially when she continues to talk after we finish praying and monopolized the conversation and we still have the language barrier. Then she called me a while ago and since I hadn’t heard from her in a long time, I answered her call, thinking she just wanted to “touch base” She said that her nephew has autismĪnd could she call me everyday and we would pray for him. I finally stopped answering her calls altogether because she After a while I limited her calls, not answering if I wasīusy doing something else. She needed a ride so I gave her rides for a year or so.During this time she call me alot She is from a foreign countryĪnd it is hard to understand her but I felt sorry for her so I tried to understand what she was saying. This is a popular post from The Friendship Blog archives that has been recently updated. Otherwise, you will likely remain as distant as you are now. You are absolutely correct in thinking there is something you don’t know. It is unfortunate that it happened but it was his decision to attend and be with her and you, not hers. Have you explicitly asked her privately, when you’re not with other friends, if you did something to offend her?Īnother thought: Did you tell her that your husband lost his job because he took off from work to attend the funeral? If so, I could see how that might have upset her. It sounds like your friend dropped you like a hot potato so something must have happened that upset her. I would appreciate any kind of advice you can give. She says she’s been busy, but she goes out every other day with a couple of our mutual friends.ĭo you know why all of a sudden she would shut me out? I do not understand how you can get close to someone and then just stop talking to them and then say that you have been too busy when you’re clearly not to other friends. I see her when we go out with mutual friends sometimes and this is when she talks to us as if nothing has happened. Ever since then she has shut us out, she hasn’t called, text, come over, or talked to me when she is online. My husband actually was laid off the next day from work because he took the day off to be with her. My husband and I were the only ones out of our mutual friends that were at the funeral and wake with her and her family the whole time. Her grandmother died of cancer almost a year ago now. She called me a couple times a day, texted me, hung out with me or talked to me online (Facebook) almost every day. She was in my wedding party and we were pretty much attached at the hip. I have a friend that I felt was my best friend. When someone suddenly shuts you out of their life and you can’t understand why, sometimes it’s prudent to ask.